Unconditional love is the feeling and action of wanting the good of the other person above all things and regardless of the consequences.
It has always been theorized about the types of love. In Ancient Greece, for example, unconditional love is framed within the term agape that refers to a reflective love where the lover is only imported for the sake of the loved one.
Unconditional love is the decision to love regardless of the consequences or disappointments because the essence of the person is loved regardless of whether he is wrong or not.
Unconditional love is a constant learning and practice and is considered a true love, such as parents’ love for their children.
To define unconditional love, some points must be considered and reprogram our idea about love:
- First: one must consider that there are several types of love. The ancient Greeks for example separated ‘love’ into at least 3 types: the philosthat is the love of friendship and companionship, the eros that is erotic and passionate love and the agape that is unconditional love. The American psychologist Robert Sternberg (1949) has also theorized various types of love as derivatives of true love.
- Second: Unconditional love is not a blind love. Unconditional love, in contrast to passionate love, romantic love or platonic love, is a long-term project therefore it is a love with eyes wide open.
- Third: A romantic relationship is not synonymous with love. One can break a love relationship because companionship and relationship did not work but still feel unconditional love for the other person.
- Fourth: Unconditional love is an action rather than a feeling. Feelings are programmed by what we receive therefore they are conditioned by our mind. Love, on the other hand, is calculated according to what we give freely without expecting anything in return.
You may also be interested in reading about the expression “love is blind. ”
Unconditional love in action
In order to give unconditional love it is useful to take into account the theory of true love of the psychologist Robert Sternberg that is born from the mixture of passion, intimacy and commitment.
The book The art of love by Erich Fromm is also a classic guide on learning to love where the practice depends on each one.
Unconditional love in action or in practice may be easier if these tips are taken into account:
- First: love yourself unconditionally. It all starts with oneself. Love each other despite our shortcomings. We must accept, recognize, understand and forgive imperfections since they are characteristic of all human beings.
- Second: the measure of love is different for each person. An act of love is an act of love only if the other person considers it to be.
- Third: learn to forgive to help the other grow.
- Fourth: unconditional love not for the suffering of life. The person who loves unconditionally supports the personal growth of the loved one who goes hand in hand with suffering. Unconditional love will not prevent suffering but will be a support to overcome and apprehend life.
- Fifth: unconditional love supports the life decisions of the other person. This does not mean not having your own opinion but respecting the path of the other. One worries but does not interfere. Love is unconditional despite the consequences.
- Sixth: No one is perfect and love is about acceptance.
“ Unconditional love is not one that keeps you blind, it is rather a resolution that nothing is more important than love. ”Talidari